The Karma of the Train goes Round and Round
by souldreamer72
Summary: Fred and George are, dare I say it, bored senseless on the train ride to Hogwarts. That is until they remember a little muggle song their dad taught them. Change some of the lyrics and you’ve got a pretty annoying prank…


Disclaimer: Let's list the stuff of what I own in this fanfic. The story plot...that's it...

George Weasley looked to his twin, who was sprawled over the seat across from him, upside-down, trying to count the number of freckles on his left arm; and failing miserably. "Twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty—wait, did I count that one?" Fred tried recounting in his mind, his face scrunched in possibly the most non-prank related concentration he had ever mustered. "Aw hell with it, how many you got Gred?"

George gave a momentary glance to his left arm, there were so many freckles it made him a tad dizzy, stupid genetics. "I'd say enough to fill a vault at Gringotts, maybe more." He mirrored Fred's position so they were both looking at the world upside-down.

"This stinks." Fred remarked after a minute's silence, "How can we possibly not have anything to do? Us? The infamous pranksters of Hogwarts? The firecracker duo?" The list of names rambled on and so did Fred.

But yes, they were in quite a predicament, probably the biggest predicament the twins had ever gotten themselves into, which was saying **a lot**. You may wonder how the two got themselves into this horrid situation; well, quite simple. Their latest and oldest pranks had been confiscated by either a) their parents, b) the conductor and trolley lady, c) their prefect brother, Percy, or d) all of the above. Hopefully you picked d for that is the correct answer. Anyways, another reason they were utterly bored was their exploding snaps game, and every other game, had totally busted for some unapparent cause, and if they used their wands for "anything other than school appropriate or related magic" as prefect Percy put it, they would get "oh so many detentions", again, Percy's words, which they gleefully welcomed (new test subjects for their inventions), and some extremely furious howlers from their mum, which snuffed their flame of hope out in a cold wind. And to top it off, they were in an inescapable slump of prankster's block. So, all in all, they were in a very, _very_, _**very**_, large, huge, massive, gargantuan, and every other word for big, predicament; in perspective of course.

"Well, as dad always says, when in doubt, sing a muggle song." George finally piped up, and he then began singing, in very off-key vocals:

_The wheels on the bus go round and round_

_Round and round _

_Round and round_

_The wheels on the bus go round and round _

_All through the town_

Now, it would seem logical for Fred to have tried to stop George, or at least covered his ears, from the very bad singing, but instead, his face cracked in enlightenment. "Gred you're a genius!" He shouted, halting George's next verse.

"I knew you'd come to your senses that I was the brilliant twin." His face then faltered from egotism, "Wait, what am I genius for?"

"That song."

"Yeah, dad taught it to us, it--"

"Drove mum and Gin and everyone else bonkers. Don't you get it?" It took him a split second to realize what Fred meant, another before his eyes lit in devious thought. "If we changed the words a bit and added a few people in--"

"We would have ourselves a prank that wouldn't get mum on our tails--"

"And give hell to people, it's a two for one deal!" He changed into a mock gentleman, giving a very foolish golf clap, "By golly my good chap we are geniuses."

George played along with a goofy smile, "Why yes we are dear sir, now, why don't we go try our lovely new experiment on a few lovely victims."

"Indubitably, why don't we start off with the prefects compartment, they always love a good song."

* * *

Percy and the other prefects were sitting stiff and proper, as if at an important business conference, discussing the issues of how to enforce the rules that some students cough Fred and George cough regularly broke. "I think that for breaking certain rules, there should be more severe punishment." Percy suggested; the others nodded like robots and kept silent, a sign for him to continue, "And for those who continuously break said rules will be--"

"Hey Perce!" Fred and George burst into the compartment, disgruntling the meeting.

"Fred, George, what are you doing in here?" Percy stood, blocking them from getting in any further, or at least tried since they shoveled right past with ease. "This is the prefect's compartment, you're not allowed in here."

"Aw but Perce--" Fred started.

"We just wanted to come here--" George continued.

"And show you--"

"Our new song." They spoke in unison, wearing identical grins, and glint of eyes. Percy caught on, he looked warily from one to the other.

"What kind of--"

Fred cut him off with a booming voice. "Alrighty, Georgie, take it away." And together they sang, a very special song:

_The Percy of the train is a great big prat_

_A great big prat_

_A great big prat_

_The Percy of the train is a great big prat_

_And confisgating our thing._

Percy stood, jaw hanging, vein pulsing, flabbergasted, mortified and livid mad all at the same time. "Well, whatcha think Perce?" They asked grinning like idiots.

"What. Do. I. Think. What do I think?" Percy's anger got the better of him, the twins had pressed the button they just loved the push. "I THINK THAT WAS THE WORST MOST EMBAR--" But he never got to finish for the two ginger heads had already leaped out of the compartment.

He huffed, his face purple from fury; but, being Percy the prefect, he composed himself, straightened his robes, and turned back to his petrified group. He cleared his throat then said, "Will be expelled."

* * *

The golden trio sat in their own little compartment, minding their own little business. Harry sat against the window, gazing out into the scenery passing by, from time to time touching his scar. Ron sat across from him, stuffing down treats from the trolley cart. And Hermione sat next to Harry, deep in her book, occasionally giving Ron disgusted looks that he never caught since he was so immersed in food. So everything was pretty much normal, that is…well you can guess.

"Ronnykins! Mione! Harry!" The twins ruptured the normality.

"Ed! Orge! Wut er ou doin ere?" Ron didn't make much sense with his mouth full, making Hermione pucker her face.

"Ronald, please swallow before you speak, it's ghastly to see what you have not digested."

He gulped down his mouthful fairly easily. "Whatever."

"Anyways," Fred interjected the small scrap the two were starting, "we just wanted to come here and show you our new song." At this, all three heads turned to see what Fred was talking about; they all knew Fred and George weren't exactly brilliant singers.

"Yes, we've added all your names in just for your enjoyment." George continued eagerly.

"Uh, and what do you mean by that?"

Harry didn't get a reply; the twins started their song without hesitation. And who was up first, well, none other than their brother:

_The Ronny of the train has many, many flaws_

_Many, many flaws_

_Many, many flaws_

_The Ronny of the train had many, many flaws_

_And yet he's our brother_

Ron's reaction to the verse with him was similar to Percy's, though his anger showed more prominent. "What in the bloody hell was that rubbish?!" He roared. Fred and George just answered –well, not his question– by singing the next part:

_The Mione of the train goes study and learn_

_Study and learn_

_Study and learn'_

_The Mione of the train goes study and learn_

_Even though she's so bloody smart_

Hermione didn't know whether to be annoyed or flattered by her stanza, being smart was a good and bad thing; so she just stared, her mouth slightly ajar. "Oh, so you're nice with Hermione's part but not mine what kind of--" Ron's little rant was cut short by the last verse:

_The Harry of the train is the Boy-Who-Lived_

_The Boy-Who-Lived_

_The Boy-Who-Lived_

_The Harry of the train is the Boy-Who-Lived_

_Yep, that's pretty much it_

Like Hermione, Harry wasn't sure how to respond to this, he stayed silent, though kept his mouth shut. Ron found this time to explode on his brothers, "Oh, and you're nice to Harry too, but not to me, no, not to your brother--"

"Well, we'll see you sooner or later, madness and all." Fred and George saluted and scampered out of their compartment. Ron was left with his unfinished rants, so sad. Too bad.

* * *

Oliver Wood was going over his newly thought out quidditch plays in a very animated manner to chaser, Katie Bell; _a real shocker_. You'd think Katie would've grown tired of listening to his every tactic, or at least said something about his constant blubbering of the game, but she didn't, for reasons easily found out if you hung around the pair long enough. "…so if the twins keep on Angelina, and you and Alicia block the others, she should be able to keep the quaffle and score."

"That sounds brilliant, as usual, but I guess that is the reason you were made captain." Katie teased slightly; he gave her a small smile.

"Well, well, well, what have we got here?" The door slide open and the firecracker duo made their grand entrance. Fred plopped down next to Oliver while George lounged by Katie.

"I'd say the obsession and denial George, wouldn't you agree?"

"Quite agree."

"Fred, George, what are you doing here?" Katie asked crisply, slightly glaring; she hated when they interjected.

"Well that's a very good question Kates, probably the best you've got." Fred commented.

"You see, we were, I shudder to say it, bored," –George made a dramatic shiver– "so we came up with this lovely song for our entertainment, starring you two." Oliver and Katie exchanged a worried glance; this never led to anything good. "Kick it off why don't you Fred." And he did, very obnoxiously:

_The Wood of the train thinks quidditch, quidditch, quidditch_

_Quidditch, quidditch, quidditch_

_Quidditch, quidditch, quidditch_

_The Wood of the train thinks quidditch, quidditch, quidditch_

_24 hours and seven days of the week_

"I do not think about quidditch all the time." Oliver snapped, his brow furrowing.

"Yeah you do." Katie snorted, she quite enjoyed Oliver's teasing, even if it didn't seem to go with her reason for hanging around him so much.

"Oh but wait, there's more, we've got one for you too Kates." Her face immediately fell, that wasn't a good sign. "George, why don't you take the courtesy of starting it off?" He nodded, grinning evily, Katie gulped, and George began:

_The Kates of the train does whatever Wood says_

_Whatever Wood says_

_Whatever Wood says_

_The Kates of the train does whatever Wood says_

_Cause she's in love with him_

Katie was blushing the red of her house colors. "Fredrick and George Weasley you two will pay" They bolted from the compartment and she ran to the door, screaming after them "HELL!"

She smiled, watching them flee at her threat. "So," And the smile instantly disappeared, her face colored as the blood rushed to her cheeks; Katie turned slowly to face a smirking Oliver. "You're in love with me."

* * *

Draco Malfoy and his little possy sat in their compartment doing, well, not really anything, but trying to act cool and all Slytherin like. Pansy, who was sitting literally against Draco's side, gasped as she heard her favorite song come up in her music. "Oh Drakie-poo, this should totally be our song, it completely describes us."

"There is no us." Draco replied coldly, shifting away, which was hard since he was already adjacent to the window; Pansy had no problem snuggling even closer, she was just that great at invading personal bubbles.

"Oh, but Drakie-poo," She whined in a nasally tone; Draco cringed slightly, her voice could get so annoying.

"Yes _Drakie-poo_, you should listen to the song." Draco's head shot up, glaring to the doorway.

"Or, you could listen to ours." Fred wagered, "I'm sure it's better."

"What are you blood traitors doing here?" He growled, his fingers reaching for his wand.

"Now, now, Drakie-poo, do magic and you'll be put in detention." George mocked.

"Get out!"

"Oh no, not before we sing you our song." Fred spoke.

"Yes, you we dedicated two verses to you." George added, smiling. "Shall we Forge?"

"We shall Gred." And they sang, in the worst possible way they could:

_The Malfoy of the train is a real big git_

_A real big git_

_A real big git_

_The Malfoy of the train is a real big git_

_Who falls for all of our pranks_

"WEASLEYS!"

* * *

Alicia and Angelina had taken their own compartment due to Oliver and Katie wanting to go over some of Oliver's quidditch plays. Both girls were flipping through sections of the Witches' Weekly looking at random girl stuff and those obscure quizzes that tell you your love type and such. It was actually quite nice, until some very unhappy peers showed up, practically at the same time.

"Spinnet, Johnson--" Oliver marched over the threshold, Katie following.

"Alicia, Angelina--" Percy stomped in.

"Angelina, Alicia--" Harry, Ron and Hermione entered as well.

"Fred and George are being absolute prats--"

"They're singing stupid songs--"

"They're being gits--"

"And completely unfair--"

"SHUT IT!" Angelina spat; she hated when they complained all at the same time.

"What's going on?" Alicia asked the question that she and Angelina both wanted to know; what had the twins done this time?

"The twins are making up this stupid song about all of us, and mostly it's all insulting or embarrassing crap." Katie took charge of the explanation. The girls sitting looked to all of the annoyed faces, to each other, then quirked eyebrows. "Since they haven't attacked you yet, we want you guys to do something."

* * *

Draco's face was infuriated, he had his hand gripped tightly around his wand, but instead of doing something himself, he barked to his big cronies, "Crabbe, Goyle, get them."

"Oh and that brings us to the second verse about you." Again they sang:

_The Malfoy of the train won't fight his own battles_

_Fight his own battles_

_Fight his own battles_

_The Malfoy of the train won't fight his own battles_

_Because he's a wimpy git_

"You will pay for this! I'm telling my father!"

"Our point proven." And they sauntered out of the compartment leaving an enraged Draco and dazed Slytherins.

After stunned silence, Pansy twittered, "My song is totally better."

* * *

Fred and George barged into their last victims' compartment. "Hello loves," They chorused. "Guess what we've got for you two!"

The two chasers slowly put down their papers, looking at the twins with glinting eyes. "Oh, what a surprise, we've got something for you two too." Angelina crooned; they set their papers down in accord and rose.

"And we'd like to give you our present first." The two Weasleys glanced to each other uncomfortably as the girls rounded on them, forcing them back to back. They began a rendition of a very familiar song, in a slow, deadly tune:

_The twins of the train should run away_

_Run away_

_Run away_

_The twins of the train should run away_

_Before they get hexed_

"Hello Fred, George." The whipped around to see their previous victims all lingering in the compartment doorway. "We've got a little unfinished business with the two of you."

The two girls leaned up to the now scared twins, "Run away."

And they did, they jumped through the little space between the vengeful students and split off; stupidly, in the same direction. Angelina and Alicia went to the doorway see the mob rush after Fred and George. Even though they were gaining distance, the two still heard the yell of either Fred or George, "Ouch! Perce, no non-school related magic!"

"This is an exception!"

The Gryffindor chasers giggled. "The karma of the train goes round and round." Angelina held out her hand.

Alicia slapped a low high-five. "Round and round."

A/N: That was longer than I thought it would be...Anyways, this is what I think of after being on a train for 40 hours in one week. Hopefully you readers thought it was kinda funny, or somewhat funny, or just plain funny because that's what i was aiming for. It might be a while before a write again (I'm going somewhere), so, hopefully this did justice to the beginning of my break from writing...okay that didn't make any sense. Never mind...


End file.
